A New Year

Wish upon a star.
Can you feel promise?
The old year is going out with the same bang.
Car wreck, irony much?
Boom.

Long nights, huge fights,
Guilt guilt guilt
Why do I feel guilty,
They still want to kick me out.
So why feel guilty?
I don't know.

It makes my stomach turn.
I sicken myself.
That jagged little pill hits the stomach
Churning and rumbling
Then it all comes up.

Rushing, flowing, bursting forth.
Is the sun rising on me or setting again?
I don't want to watch,
Please don't let me find out.

I'm eager and urgent and nervous and
Broken
Can I make up my mind?
I want to spend every minute,
No, second.
Every hour and night.
With you.

I upset myself, and yourself.
Even in all of that, you make me.
Happy.

The moon could be crashing into the earth...
And so long as I'm with you at midnight,
This will be a good year.